I always thought that my ideal vacation would be “next year,” but my husband told me that I was “too old” to enjoy it.
My spouse told me I was “too old” for the dream vacation after years of postponing it.
Deb has been dreaming about a wonderful trip to Greece for a very long time. However, her husband Dan continues to put things off. When Deb is well into her 60s, she decides to take matters into her own hands and uses all of the money she has saved up to take her trip. But when she comes back, will Dan still be there?
Greece has always been my dream trip destination, ever since I can remember. I could picture myself exploring the Athens ruins on vacation or taking in the dancing light of the sunset sun setting over Santorini’s whitewashed cliffs.
Pretty, don’t you think?
That objective was the only thing that helped me get through the hardships of life, the countless sacrifices, and the never-ending pressure of work. My prize, my escape, from years of holding it together, was Greece.
And so I started saving. I saved every spare penny I had for the trip I’d promised myself I would take at some point. My simple goal was to save as much money as possible and, after I hit my goal, to treat my husband, Dan, to this incredible trip. I’d been open with him about my wish for this amazing trip ever since we got married.
Dan used to say, “We’ll go next year, Deb,” and I was all with it. He said this every year. “All I have to do to move forward is straighten out our home and pay off my debt.”
At first, I had faith in him. Well, why wouldn’t I? But when Dan started talking about his debt more, I understood that if I wanted to go on our trip, I had to put more money aside for it.
I used to work as a private chef for two different families every week, but I wanted to make more money, so I started taking orders for personalized cakes and desserts from people.
“Deb, why are you doing too much at work?” I ordered pizza one evening because I was too tired to prepare dinner for Dan.
I said, “Dude, all I want to do is save money.” “Get us to Greece, please.”
Oh Deborah, I’m so sorry. I apologize. “When will you stop talking about Greece?” he muttered.
“I’ll stop when I’m done. Could you please come with me? I asked.
My partner became understanding and brought me a glass of wine.
“Of course, darling,” he exclaimed. I’m sorry; work has been really stressful lately. Teaching math to pupils who don’t want to study is incredibly difficult.
“It’s okay,” I answered, trying to figure out if he was telling the truth or not.
He answered, “I’m all for it, Deb, I swear to you.”
Naturally, I thought we would work together to make it happen. But Dan would always say, “next year,” whenever the topic came up. And when “next year” arrived, there was always an explanation.
“Deb, work is too busy.”
“I am unable to pay for the time off.”
“The geyser is broken and the dishwasher is on the verge of breaking.” We have to give that our highest priority before thinking about a holiday.
I assured myself it was all right. After all, we would go at last. After a while, when everything had finally calmed down, everyone would enjoy themselves.
But things never really became comfy in life.
Instead, the years went very swiftly and the trip was never discussed. And by the time I was almost sixty-five, I had saved up enough cash for a trip for the two of us. Not only that, but I could easily afford business class airfares and five-star accommodations.
I decided not to wait any longer. I was the one who prepared everything. A two-week fantasy vacation. All I had ever seen of Athens, Santorini, and Mykonos were pictures from travel publications. I even bought a new bikini for myself, which I hadn’t done in a very long time.
I wanted to feel good about myself and, for once, enjoy the life I had worked so hard to build.
So I sat Dan down one evening. I even made his favorite baked potatoes and lamb chops to sweeten the soup.
“Dan,” I said at first. “My savings are adequate. Let’s go to Greece to celebrate my 65th birthday.
He looked up from his phone, giving me a quick look and then laughed sharply, his fork almost in his mouth.
Greece? Deb, really? at your age? He spoke icily.
“What’s the intended meaning of that?” I stopped moving.
My husband shook his head, leaned back, and pretended that I had gone completely crazy and that he would have to take his time to explain things to me. like I was one of his students.
“I mean, come on, Greece?” he screamed, shaking his head. Do you not believe that you are currently too old for it? What are you going to do there? Walk around in that inexpensive bikini you bought? No one wants to see it. You don’t want to be showing off in front of a bunch of kids.
The way he said it made my skin crawl, as though I was simply a simpleton with no sense of self-awareness. I sat there, astonished, wondering how the man I’d been married to for twenty years could have spoken anything so offensive.
Dan, you know, I’ve been putting money down for this trip for years. We’ve always talked about taking trips together. I want to enjoy everything with you.
He shrugged his shoulders.
Yes, then maybe you should concentrate on something more logical. Something like to visiting a lodge somewhere? or toward the coast? a calm, relaxing spot where you can read. In Greece, people half our age belong. You are no longer twenty years old.
My throat tightened, but I made myself say something.
Just stating, “Dan, this is my dream,”
His visage hardened, and he threw his half-eaten lamb chop onto his plate.
Deb, this illusion is a waste of your time and money. Would you mind handing me the money you’ve saved in regard to that? I’ve been thinking about going fishing with the boys. That is a much better use of the money. It is not required to squander it on some ridiculous dream.”
That’s when I went completely insane.
All these years, I’d been waiting for him. I postponed my happiness, my freedom, and my ambition because I thought we were all in this together. It was meant to be, Dan and I, together forever. It was supposed to be our Greek honeymoon.
Still, we weren’t. He had never shown any interest in my dream.
I got up and gave my chair a solid shove back.
“I’m going to Greece, Dan,” I said.
“You sure are,” he made fun of.
I had never had the courage to take a chance before, but because Dan was out the following morning, I did. The excursion was arranged for the next day. Greece for a fortnight. Without reserve. Do not request that Dan check again. Nothing.
Everything revolved around me and my wants. I grabbed a pen, packed up my belongings, and left a note on the kitchen counter.
Dan, you’re correct. I’m too old. I can’t wait any longer for someone who doesn’t care because I’m too old. Enjoy your fishing trip; you bear the expense.
And with that, I left.
Even though I was unaware of what would happen next, to be honest, I didn’t care. I simply knew that if I stayed, I would never be able to forgive myself. And I would find Dan intolerable.
As soon as I stepped off the plane in Athens, I could feel a shift in myself.
The air felt different, lighter and warmer. I was no longer waiting. Walking among the historic ruins, I felt as though the past of this place washed over me like a wave. Standing on a cliff in Santorini, I felt free for the first time in a long time.
Of course, I also wore the one I bought. What else are you aware of? I looked amazing wearing it. I could not give a damn about what people said. I was carrying on with my day.
Finally.
And then something extraordinary happened.
On one of those stunning evenings in Santorini, I got to know Michael. Sitting alone in a café, he had a charming smile on his face as he looked out at the lake. We struck up a conversation, and before I knew it, we were sharing dinner and talking about our lives for hours.
“A personal chef?” He raised an eyebrow in curiosity. “That is quite remarkable.”
“I love working with my hands,” was my response. “And I love the intimacy that comes with cooking.”
For the rest of our trip, we laughed over dinners, toured islands, drank cocktails, and enjoyed the kind of connection I hadn’t realized I was missing. Rather than seeing someone who was “too old” or past her prime, Michael saw a lady who wanted to make a difference in her life.
Greece met every need and wish I had, and then some.
When I finally made it home, Dan was gone. After packing, he walked on. But he had moved in with his brother, as I found out via a note.
Rather than feeling abandoned or lost, I felt relieved.
I was unrestricted.
Months later, I’m still in touch with Michael, curious to see what will happen next.
In the scenario, how would you have handled things?
