The teacher asked, “Who gets a 2-dollar reward for telling me who the most famous man in history was?”
An Irish boy answered, “I think St. Patrick did it.” Sorry, Sean, your answer isn’t right.”

Afterward, a young French student raised his hand and claimed, “It was Napoleon.” The teacher told Pierre, “I’m afraid that answer isn’t correct either.”
Then, a Jewish boy stood up and stated, “Jesus Christ was the one.” The teacher acknowledged, “Congratulations, Maurice. Come over here and I’d love to hand you 2 dollars.”
While giving Maurice his money, the teacher said, “You being Jewish, Maurice, I was quite taken aback when you mentioned Jesus Christ.”
Maurice said, “Yes.” Despite it being clear to me that it was Moses I agreed, because I had to conduct business.
It was the woman who had wealth and it was the man who was poor and truthful.
She was fond of him, but he knew it would never mean more.
That evening, he was more affectionate than I was used to seeing. I think you are quite wealthy, he said.
“Right,” she said, “I’m worth 1.25 million dollars.”
“And I don’t have much money,” he told her. Will you say yes and marry me?
“No.”
I didn’t think you’d agree to this.
So the better question is, “What made you ask?”
Just to see what it feels like when a man loses $1.25 million.
Stanley would like to have a different desk at his office.
He finds a great one in the window of an antique shop.
He goes up to the storefront and asks about the price.
“If you want that desk, it’s $5000,” the shopkeeper replies.
Ok, nobody wants to pay that much for an old desk. Are you serious?” Stanley exclaims.
Ah, replies the shopkeeper, “This is a magic desk.” He faces the desk and says, “Desk, what is the amount of money I am carrying?”
The desk knocks the floor with one of its legs four times. He pulls out his pocket and there are the four dollar coins, as expected.
“That’s very cool, wow,” says Stan. “Okay desk, I want to know, how much money does my wife have in the bank?”
At this moment, the desk starts banging its legs up and down furiously for half a dozen minutes without stopping.
Stanley thinks to himself, “I don’t know how she learned all that!”
The desk’s feet come apart and the drawers begin to slide down.