It was simply another day on the roads. A husband and wife drove down a peaceful stretch of road at a steady 40 miles per hour. The sun hung lazily over the horizon. He was driving, calm and controlled, with his eyes on the lanes ahead. She was not quite as calm as he was.
She broke the silence and declared to him, loud and clear, “I know we’ve been married for more than twenty years, but I want a divorce.”
Nothing happened.
The spouse maintained his hands on the wheel and his eyes on the road. He didn’t say anything or move, but the speedometer on the automobile went up to 45 mph.
“I’m serious,” she said again, this time with more confidence. “Don’t attempt to talk me out of it. I’ve been sleeping with your best buddy, and he’s a better lover than you ever were.
The hubby still hasn’t said anything. The automobile creeped up to 55 mph, and his jaw tightened just a little bit.
She kept going, as if she were testing his limitations.
“I want the house,” she said with determination.
Again, the speed went up to 60 mph.
“I want the car too,” she said, keeping a tight eye on him.
The car went even faster, reaching 65 mph. It was clear that there was a lot of tension in the car, like static before a storm.
“Give me the bank accounts, the credit cards, the boat—everything.”
Now they were going straight toward a huge concrete bridge. She gazed ahead at the road, then back at her husband. The air felt different now; it was heavier. She was nervous and finally asked, “Isn’t there anything you want?”
He spoke for the first time during the whole talk. His voice was calm and even friendly.
“No,” he answered, looking at her out of the corner of his eye. “I already have all I need.”
She frowned. “Oh really?” she said, her voice getting sarcastic. “What do you have?”
He grinned.
“The airbag.”
Be quiet.
On the other side of town, a different couple, one considerably older, was enjoying a big event in their lives. A couple in their early sixties was celebrating their 35th wedding anniversary at a quiet, romantic restaurant with soft candlelight and string music.
A small but beautiful fairy came on their supper table in a flash of light and glitter.
She said in a gentle voice, “You two have been loyal and devoted for 35 years.” “As a thank you, I will grant each of you one wish.”
The wife gasped and her eyes lit up. She said, “I want to travel the world with my husband,” and held her hands together.
The fairy grinned, waved her wand, and poof! She got two tickets for the Queen Mary 2 trip.
The husband was next. He thought for a moment, looking back and forth between the fairy and his wife. He then replied softly, “This is very romantic, and I love my wife…” But chances like this only happen once in a lifetime. I’m sorry, my darling, but I want a woman who is 30 years younger than me.
The fairy and the wife both stopped in their tracks, shocked and heartbroken.
But a wish is still a wish.
The fairy waved her wand and said, “Abracadabra!” In a flash of light, the husband turned 92 years old.
People say that life is all about making decisions. Some people think it’s all about the timing. But sometimes it’s just about who has the wand or the wheel.
