A blonde with a baby asks the pharmacist if she may use the baby scale when she enters the pharmacy.
“I’m sorry, ma’am,” the cashier replies. “Our infant’s scale has broken. Weighing the mother and child together on an adult scale, then the mother alone, and subtracting the second number from the first will allow us to determine the baby’s weight.
“Oh, that won’t work,” the blonde replies.
“Why not?” the clerk asks.
She responds, “Because I’m the aunt, not the mother.”
The blond wife returned home after her first day of city commuting.
“Honey, are you feeling all right?” her husband questioned, seeing that she appeared a bit peaked.
“Really not,” she answered. “I feel sick from sitting in the back of the train.”
“Unfortunately,” he said. “Why didn’t you ask the person seated across from you to take a seat across from you for a little while?”
“I couldn’t,” she said, “because nobody was there.”
A blonde with burns on both ears enters a doctor’s clinic one day.
What happened? the doctor asks. The phone rang as I was ironing my work suit, and I picked up the iron by accident instead of the phone, she explains.
“Well, one ear makes sense now, but what about the other?”
“That moron called again!”
She had on headphones and was rollerblading.
She went to a hair parlor and requested a haircut.
She told the hairdresser that she could not remove her headphones.
She departed after the hairdresser refused to trim her hair in response.
She made the same statement at another hair parlor.
The hairdresser consented to cut her hair this time.
Eventually, the blond dozed out in the chair.
The stylist pulled off the headphones to wake her.
The blonde flopped and perished as soon as it hit the ground.
The stylist, bewildered by the situation, put on the headphones.
They were saying, “Inhale, exhale.”
Recent advances in fertility technologies have allowed a 65-year-old lady to become pregnant.
Her family members visited her when she was released from the hospital and returned home.
One person inquired whether they may see the new baby.
“Not yet,” the mother replied. “First, we can visit for a while, and I’ll make coffee.”
“May we see the new baby now?” inquired another relative after thirty minutes had gone by.
“No, not just yet,” the mother replied.
They repeated, “May we see the baby now?” after a few more minutes had passed.
“No, not just yet,” the mother said.
They were agitated and said, “So, when can we see the baby?”
Upon hearing him cry, she informed them.
“Why must we wait until he cries?”
I forgot where I put him, which is why. Alright?
